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About Deviant Eylim BaldwinOther/Canada Group :iconthe-drd: The-DRD
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Deviant for 5 Years
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There was a sad man who sat beside my bed.
He is one of the first things I remember. Other kids' imaginary friends were much more exciting. They had cowboys and princesses and animals of every description. But all I had was my Sad Man, and he wasn't exciting at all. All he ever did was sit there, and read his book (a different one each time, not that I could tell the difference. This was before I learned to read.) Sometimes he would hum snatches of Gilbert & Sullivan to himself. (I didn't know what they were at the time. It was only later, when I was 19 and saw the Pirates of Penzance for the first time that I recognized the music as the songs my Sad Man would sing.) And he would say weird things. "I tried to smuggle some gin into your room," he said once, "but they caught me." Or once, "remember when your parents found out you were gay?" (I couldn't.) And on one memorable occasion, "how did you manage to blow up that hotel room?" (I didn't know.)
Sad Man liked to pretend he wasn't sad
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Jori's Hedgehog by randomrandomandeven Jori's Hedgehog :iconrandomrandomandeven:randomrandomandeven 3 0 Dead Smiley by randomrandomandeven Dead Smiley :iconrandomrandomandeven:randomrandomandeven 0 0
Faim de Loup
The wolf opens his mouth and breathes in
He breathes in mice, and strawberries, and tiny glass angels but it is not enough
He breathes in trees and chairs and ladies' shoes but it is not enough
He breathes in houses and mountains and elephants
He breathes in dinosaur bones
If anything, he is even hungrier than he was before
The wolf takes a deep breath and breathes in the World
He stands on empty space, looking for more
Space smells of smoke and burning metal
He breathes in Mercury, and Mars and Venus
He breathes in all the planets and the Sun
It still is not enough.
Looking around, he sees little lights blinking in the distance,
The wolf spreads his wings and flies off in search of more food.
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King of the Ether
        Mad, they called me! Crazy hippie, they called me! But I'll show them. Hippies are pacifists. When I pull my army out of the ether they will rue the day they called me a disgusting mess with poor hygiene who needs to get a job! We will fly on the wind and travel through the smoke and everyone will have to wear blue hats on Sundays, oh yes they will! And I shall be the King of the Earth and the President of Mars and the Emperor of San Francisco. (I understand the last one passed away some twenty years ago, leaving no heirs, it was a tragic affair all round.) When I am king the world will sing, or so they say. Who are they, you ask? Did I not tell you about my ether army? They're made of ether, which is a kind of chocolate, I believe. And no one will resist them because they will be so delicious. And there will be peace on earth except for those who eat copious amounts of garlic, for they shall be forced to fight to the death in the gladiat
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A Short Play About Jam
LAURA is a workaholic who volunteers a lot. She appears extroverted and bubbly, but is under a lot of stress. ROBERT is a laid back goth whose penchant for sarcasm sometimes gets him in trouble.
Scene: A farmer's market. Robert and Laura get to the berry table at the same time. There is only one tray of strawberries left. They both reach for it.
Laura: Sorry, I had them first.
Robert: That is a lie. A blatant lie, in fact. Besides, you don't need the whole tray.
Laura: Listen honey, I've got a whole lot of jam to make. That means I need all of these. You can come back tomorrow, there'll be a fresh crop.
Robert: Honey?
Laura: That's what you got from that.
Robert: You called me honey.
Laura: Yes, but I was being patronizing, dear.
Robert: You did it again.
Laura: What?
Robert: Are you hitting on me?
Laura: No.
Robert: Then let me have one basket, dear. Just one basket from the tray.
Laura: Now you're doing it.
Robert: Yes, but I'm mocking you.
Laura: You're mocking me?
Robert: What's th
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Fire by randomrandomandeven Fire :iconrandomrandomandeven:randomrandomandeven 1 0 Water by randomrandomandeven Water :iconrandomrandomandeven:randomrandomandeven 0 0 Fatale by randomrandomandeven Fatale :iconrandomrandomandeven:randomrandomandeven 1 0
Before Duchamp
The nude descended the staircase and the devil welcomed her with open arms.
"I thought you'd end up here, " he said, his grin full of teeth. She shuddered despite the heat.
"We are not so different you and I," he crooned. "We have committed the same crime." The nude hissed and spat in his eyes.
"We are not the same," she insisted. "We have done the same thing, but not for the same reasons. My intent…"
"The road to hell is paved with good intentions, girl," he said. "It does not matter now. You are mine,
and I have a job for you."
She was curious despite herself. Her slitted eyes brightened with interest.
"What? What do you want me to do?"
The devil smiled and held out a shining red fruit.
"You have an apple to deliver."
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Spoons (A Mostly True Story)
It is an ancient tradition. Five of us are sitting at the table. I deal the cards, one to each person, even Ros, who had stated that she does not want to play. "You can start with no letters," I say. "Oliver doesn't have any letters, and neither do I. Barbara and Mike are both at SPO." She rolls her eyes and agrees, claiming that persistence trumps stubbornness. I solemnly deal out the cards, four to each player. Oliver arranges the spoons in such a way to ensure that whoever grabs the first one will send the rest of them flying. It's a good thing we're not playing Forks. Or Knives. The metal spoons have been replaced with plastic ones, to reduce the chance of injuries.
        It doesn't work. On the first round, the spoons, predictably, fly everywhere. Oliver hits his head while trying to retrieve a spoon from under the table. I am left with no spoon, and my first letter. On the next turn, it is Mike who is left spoon-less. "SPOO, SPOO," we poi
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Grade 2 Book Report (Gylfaginning)
My Book Report
By Eylim Baldwin Age 7
I have decided to do my book report on a book I found at the library but not the scool one because they only have books for kids ther. This book is called Gylfaginning and that is not a spelling mistake because I made sure. It is a long book and so I only read chapter 42 because it is my favorit number and also this story has lost of ponies in it. The story is about how a guy named Gangleri which sounds like Gangrene tells how come Odin has a magic pony that has lost of legs.
        So the gods wer done making Midgard, which I guess is a castel to gard the middle of stuff. Then they wanted to make Valhall, because their castel has no halls so they wanted to make a hall and call it val which is like short for Valerie and is a weird name for a hall but is not the weirdest part. Then there came a wright, who said he'd make a citadel which is like a city but more fancy, and it would be proof of Hill-Giants and R
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If I were cleaning my house, I’d wipe away the toxins
I’d scrub off the extra fat, and dust off every muscle,
Patch up the rough spots, by treating my body like
a Temple,
I’d mop the fears off the floor, throw away hatred
Stacked in piles, and blocking true self-perception,
Sweep the sorrows, bury the woes & forget all stress
that keeps me weighed down
Empty out the attic filled with past traumas, brush cobwebs
from clinging memories, kill the lingering spiders
that scurry in search of a new crevice to hide in,
Safe from the invisible, silent poison
Shut away the other voices, drain the haunting laughter
Then I’d vacuum up darkness, and spray light into the air,
Suffocate society
Finish off outside, give the place a new coat of paint,
Mend the chipped, broken, & battered panels that hang
Rusting and weathered with age, hoping that they’ll be
Remembered as once being young
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Fuck Fairy Tales The Wicked Witch of the West by chrisables
Mature content
Fuck Fairy Tales The Wicked Witch of the West :iconchrisables:chrisables 275 20
Fuck Fairy Tales Captain Hook by chrisables
Mature content
Fuck Fairy Tales Captain Hook :iconchrisables:chrisables 256 14
Fuck Fairy Tales The Joker by chrisables Fuck Fairy Tales The Joker :iconchrisables:chrisables 480 22 Sansa Stark Queen in the North by slothmaker Sansa Stark Queen in the North :iconslothmaker:slothmaker 109 18
It Was A Day
It was a day a little bit like today
the way the clouds threw shadows over the hill
the day you realized that you weren’t going to find your future.
You were never going to go to Mars
or Pern
or Krynn
You were never going to open the door that led, inexorably, to Narnia
(or even Telmar, you weren’t picky, and you were confident of your ability
to lead the revolution.)
Inigo Montoya was not going to slap you on the back
and invite you to take up the mantle of the Dread Pirate Roberts.
There would be no sardonic Vulcans or Andorians;
you would never be handed an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.
That was a strange day.
It ranked up there with the day that you realized that everybody else saw the you in the mirror, not the you inside your head. Not the you that was lean and tough and clever, not the you with perfect hair and a resonant voice that never said “Um….?”
Not that you.
No, they got the one that was fat and wobbly and stiff inside with
:iconursulav:ursulav 386 77
5 McCrimmon's Worth of Style by rachelroach 5 McCrimmon's Worth of Style :iconrachelroach:rachelroach 159 32 British troops board their train, 1939 |Colorized by JohnnyMex British troops board their train, 1939 |Colorized :iconjohnnymex:JohnnyMex 8 3 Charlie Chaplin, 1916 at the age of 27 |Colorized by JohnnyMex Charlie Chaplin, 1916 at the age of 27 |Colorized :iconjohnnymex:JohnnyMex 2 1 The Owls Are Not What They Seem V by bedowynn The Owls Are Not What They Seem V :iconbedowynn:bedowynn 118 8 northern wind by LiigaKlavina northern wind :iconliigaklavina:LiigaKlavina 972 37 Nyarlathotep by Girhasha Nyarlathotep :icongirhasha:Girhasha 638 78 Leslie by whitehotphoenix Leslie :iconwhitehotphoenix:whitehotphoenix 621 323 The Mariner's Demise - ACEO by sphinxmuse
Mature content
The Mariner's Demise - ACEO :iconsphinxmuse:sphinxmuse 48 16
Taxman II: Rising Water by ursulav Taxman II: Rising Water :iconursulav:ursulav 529 30



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LidiaVives Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Professional Photographer
thx for the fav!! :D <3

if you like my work you can follow me on facebook:
randomrandomandeven Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013
I definitely will! I always like to see awesome art in my newsfeed.
charlieterrell Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
Thanks for watching, Eylim